Sometimes, life has a funny way of reminding you who you are — especially when you start to forget.
Two weekends ago, I had one of those reminders.
I had to take a step back — from everything. From certain people, from posting on 224, from the constant noise.
I ended up taking an 11-day break, and honestly… I needed it.
Because yeah, I disappeared for a bit.
And truthfully? I went through a time that tested my peace, my patience, and my purpose.
But the beautiful part? I came back anyway.
People Are Going to Talk — Let Them
One thing I’ve learned is this: people are always going to talk about you. Always.
They’ll have opinions, assumptions, projections — and that’s okay.
What’s not okay is shrinking because of it.
And that’s what I did for a while.
I let people’s judgments make me question myself.
I pulled away from something I built from my heart — this space that sometimes stresses me out but also saves me.
That’s backwards, right?
But when you care as deeply as I do, it’s easy to forget that peace doesn’t live in other people’s approval.
Let People Be Who They Are
I’ve realized I can’t keep holding people to the same standard I hold myself. That’s just not them — and that’s okay.
I love deeply. I care hard.
So when I find out disappointing things, it hurts.
But I’m done letting that break me.
I’m done pulling away from what I love because others can’t match my energy.
I’m learning to let people be who they are, while still protecting who I am.
The Real Growth
That weekend showed me just how much I’ve grown.
You ever catch yourself reacting differently — softer, calmer — and think, “Wow, old me would’ve wilded out?”
Yeah. That’s growth.
But growth doesn’t always mean silence. Sometimes, it means speaking up.
People have been taking my kindness for granted for far too long. And I had to remind myself — standing up for yourself isn’t wrong. Setting boundaries isn’t wrong. Calling out weird energy isn’t wrong.
I’ll never apologize for that again.
Because growth doesn’t mean keeping the peace by staying quiet — it means protecting your peace loudly when you need to.
Reflection and Acceptance
I’ve made mistakes.
I’ve been a bad friend before.
I’ve been in toxic situations that made me into someone I didn’t even like.
But I’ve grown.
And anyone still holding me to an old version of me — that’s on them.
Even the people closest to you can hold you to a version of yourself that you’re not anymore.
Some people never truly try to understand you; they just cling to whatever story makes them comfortable.
And if you let those people back in, they’ll start rewriting your peace to fit their delusion.
I’m not doing that anymore.
I’ve had people cry, apologize, then turn around and talk about me like I wouldn’t find out.
And when I go quiet, I’m the bad guy? Nah.
I have boundaries too.
And just because someone doesn’t like how I protect myself doesn’t mean I’m wrong for doing it.
But I also learned there’s a difference between protecting yourself and shutting down completely.
Love, Loss, and Lessons
That’s somebody I will love until the sun stops burning.
I hurt her with my silence — not on purpose, but in a way that I could recognize.
Like, I saw myself from the outside looking in, and I didn’t like it.
She and I probably won’t ever be friends the same way again, and that’s okay.
We had a heart-to-heart — way too long after the fact — but it was real.
Even when she didn’t understand me or was angry about how life played out, she never condemned me.
She never talked shit.
She never threw my name around.
And that’s rare.
She’s one of the only people who saw me in every version of myself and didn’t try to trap me in one.
That kind of love is different.
I went back this week and reread something she said to me once:
“When you have genuine people, make sure you hold on to them, because it’s rare.”
And I felt that in my chest.
Because it is rare.
And I’ll be listening to that.
Taking this step back reminded me of the people I do have — the ones who show up without being asked, who pour into me the way I pour into them.
I’ve been trying to water the connections I already have.
Life has been a lot lately, and I know I’ve been distant, but I’m working on it — rehoning, refocusing, re-grounding.
Because when I look around, I see the people who are meant for me.
The ones who care. The ones who always do.
To everyone who’s reached out, supported me, reminded me that my voice matters — I appreciate you more than you know.
You reminded me who I am.
The Comeback
So no, I’m not shutting the world out.
I’m not punishing all my friends because of a few.
I’m not living inside anyone else’s delusion.
I’m done with the victim mentality.
I’m waking up.
I’m tuning in.
I’m owning my peace.
I’m recognizing my faults and leaving them where they belong — in the past.
I’m done worrying about how others feel about my boundaries.
From now on, I’m pouring fully into myself — and into my 224s.
I’m taking my own advice this time.
Because this — right here — this is our becoming.
